Obscure and Unexpected

Do you still feel like you are fighting a losing battle? Have you tried everything you know of to break the hindrances off your life only to find yourself more bound? A few weeks ago, someone asked me how to stop the cycle of sin and addiction in their life and I did not have the answer. I still don’t.

How God delivered me will likely be very different from how He will deliver you. However, one thing remains true: God is the same yesterday, today and forever. His promises of freedom and wholeness are for all who call on the name of Jesus. There are no second class citizens in the Kingdom of God.

So, why do some walk in freedom while others spend their whole life struggling?Revelation concerning what hinders you is personal. The Word provides us with amazing guidance, direction and truth but it is our responsibility to use what we have been given to find victory over what has enslaved us.

The easy thing, often times, is to open the Word and read the scriptures that we know pertain specifically to our situation. If we are struggling with our finances, we read about God’s provision and about testing Him with our tithe. If we are trying to overcome doubt, we read about faith. When we are in the grip of sexual sin or addiction, we read about purity.

This is a wonderful practice and one I would encourage you to continue in. However, much of my revelation in certain areas of life has come from passages that seem a little more obscure or unrelated.

My greatest lessons about spiritual warfare were learned not by studying how Jesus and the disciples cast out demons, but by reading about Jesus’ temptation in the desert.

I overcame unforgiveness when i began to take seriously the Biblical mandate to love my enemies and pray for those who persecute me.

I found healing in the midst of my husband’s addiction by meditating on finding shelter under the wings of the Almighty.

Holy Spirit is not bound by our understanding. He knows not only what you are dealing with but why. He understands what you need to break free. He can and will bring revelation in unexpected ways and times. Just because you have not found the answer you seek in the Word yet does not mean it is not there. The Bible needs to be taken in its fullness. It is all relevant. Every word speaks truth that has the potential and power to transform. Do not give up on the pursuit of truth.

This weekend, take some time to seek Holy Spirit’s direction as you study. Ask Him where to look for guidance and revelation. Follow His lead. If you are someone who follows a reading plan, I encourage you to continue in that, but also to take a little extra time to ask if there is something you need to read.

Your answer is on the way. The Word always accomplishes the purpose of God.

photo credit: Chiara Centanni via photopin cc

 

One Old Wineskin at a Time

http://photopin.com/

There is no limit to what Holy Spirit can do in and through you. New revelation is constantly available. Freedom from sin, addiction and bondage abounds every day. He is waiting to lead and direct your path. With the power and presence of Holy Spirit in your life, nothing is impossible.

Unless you get in the way. In order to receive new revelation, you must first be willing to have old mindsets and attitudes changed. For freedom from addiction and bondage to be realized, you must first learn to lean on the strength of Holy Spirit completely and be willing to endure pain in your flesh for the sake of breakthrough in your spirit. If you desire His guidance and direction, you must cultivate a lifestyle of listening to His voice and move when He says move.

It is time for a new wineskin. Jesus said that new wine is not suitable for an old wineskin. You cannot pour new revelation into a mind that is unable to contain or believe the truth. You cannot break free when in your heart, mind and soul you remain bound. You cannot follow His guidance and direction when you are too clouded by confusion and discouragement to truly hear His voice. You must adopt a new wineskin.

Begin by asking Him to reveal the old wineskin you are trying to pour new wine into. Trying to change yourself will only lead to frustration, hopelessness and defeat. Often times, when people hear a message like this one the first instinct is to go and try to right all the wrongs. You, like the rest of us, are a work in progress. You cannot wake up tomorrow completely renewed or free from everything that has hindered you in the past. Take one step at a time. Resist the urge to go on a fishing expedition, seeking everything you can find that might be responsible for why you cannot get free. Ask Holy Spirit to reveal what needs to be dealt with today. If you still don’t know, ask again tomorrow. Then wait. Wait for Him to bring it to the forefront. When you know, ask for the next step to overcome.

Take the first step, but let Him finish the work. A willing heart is the difference between those who find freedom and those who remain bound. When you are willing to face your wrong mindsets, attitudes and actions, Holy Spirit has something to work with. Just remember that in order for the work to be real and lasting, it must be His. Take the steps He guides you to take. Deal with the sin He reveals. Walk through the doors He opens. Cling to the truth He speaks to your heart. And trust Him to do the rest.

The Truth Will Set You Free?

Do you know someone who seems to have a clear, direct line to God? Someone who is able to discern His voice, understand His Word and follow His direction? That is the result of the work of revelation Holy Spirit does in born again believers who continually seek to know Him and to know about Him.

Revelation breaks bondage. When Jesus promised that the truth would set you free, He was talking not just about hearing the truth, but about truly knowing the truth. When Holy Spirit breathes revelation into a truth, it will forever change the way you approach things.

You may have grown up your whole life being told “God loves you”, but you still question it.

You know the Word says that you are more than a conqueror but you still seem unable to conquer.

Everywhere you turn, grace is being preached or taught and yet you are still unable to receive it and when you sin, you feel condemned.

The Word says that God provides new mercies daily, yet you have begun to think it is too late for you.

You have been taught that if you continue to sow and to work, you will reap a harvest. However, you are so tired and weary and you have seen so little fruit for your efforts that you are ready to quit.

Without revelation, the truth of the Word can often seem like an abstract concept; a promise that is there for others but not you.

Once Holy Spirit reveals something to you, you will be able to go from choosing to believe the true because that is what the Word commands to holding steadfastly to the truth because it is yours now. It is unshakable. You have been given a gift that cannot be taken from you.

You will begin to believe that the promises of God are there for you. Formerly impossible situations will lose their intimidating hold over your heart and mind and you will have the boldness to step out on the truth.

You will begin to see God move in exciting ways as your faith is increased. When you act in faith on a promise of God because you know it to be true, amazing things happen. They may not happen overnight, but your new ability to wholeheartedly believe the truth will give you the perseverance to endure the wait and not to be shaken in the meantime.

The Word will come alive again. If the Bible has become dry and without meaning, it does not mean that there is something wrong with you or that the Word is not worthwhile. It merely means that you need to seek revelation into the truth of the Word. It may be that a passage you have read a thousand times will come to life in a new way and change your mindset. It may be that Holy Spirit will lead you to a verse that will provide an answer you have been asking for. Whatever form it takes, revelation will give you power for everyday life and to overcome in difficult seasons.

If you are dry, stalled or without direction, ask Holy Spirit for revelation today. Then, take the truth you have been given and walk it out.

Paralysis By Fear

Yesterday at Bible study, we were discussing fear and how it can poison our hearts and paralyze our lives. Fear, if it is allowed to take root and have control, will rob you of opportunity, freedom and fulfillment. However, it is one thing to know about fear and a completely different thing to know how to conquer it.

Breaking free from the power of fear in your life is not easy sometimes. When you have been living afraid of something, letting go of it can be a battle. But it is battle that you have the authority to win in Christ. When you shatter the hold fear has over you, you will never live the same again. First, though, you must be willing to face it and defeat it:

Understand the distinction between feeling fear and being afraid.

In Joshua chapter one God commanded Joshua not to be afraid. To be strong and courageous. He promised him that he would never leave his side. He did not tell him that it was wrong to feel fear. Feelings do not have the power to dictate who you are or what you do unless you give them that power. To say that feeling fear is the same as being afraid is to say that feeling lonely is the same as being alone. Or that feeling insecure is the same as being inadequate. Sometimes feelings are just that: feelings. Don’t give them more power than they deserve and you won’t end up bowing down to them. In some cases, all it takes to be free from fear is a choice to do what you need to do even if you are fearful doing it.

Recognize the lie behind the fear.

The truth will set you free. Any thoughts that are causing you to remain bound are not rooted in the truth; they are lies. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you the lie that is fueling your fear. If you are afraid of being alone, have you forgotten God’s promise never to leave you or forsake you? If you are terrified of failure, have you believed a lie that you have to be successful by the standards of others in order to win the approval of God and man? If you are scared that you are not going to be able to pay your bills or provide for your family, have you bought into the lie that God does not care enough to take care of you? Have you forgotten that He is you source and your provider?

No matter what the fear is, there is a lie at the root of it. Dig it out so you can move forward.

Search the Scriptures to find the truth.

Just as light defeats darkness, lies are conquered by the truth. Most of the time, it is not our lack of prayer, Bible reading or time with God that is responsible for our fear (though sometimes it is), it is a lack of understanding about what we believe to be true. Once you have identified the lie, you have almost won the battle. Any mindset that sets itself up in opposition to the truth of God’s word is built on a foundation of sand. Once confronted with the truth of His promises, it will crumble.

Do you believe you will always be bound by addiction? Seek the truth about God’s promises of freedom and victory.

Do you believe that you have messed up too completely to start again? Cling to the promises of grace and mercy.

Have you resigned yourself to always being sick? Search the word for the promise of healing.

Repent and stand firm.

It is not feeling fear you need to repent for. It is living in it. Believing the lie instead of having faith in God and in the power of His Word. Find your truth, choose to agree with it and stand firm on it until breakthrough comes.

Stop feeling guilty for feeling fear. Recognize the lie, seek out the truth, repent for not believing God and start standing in faith. Your deliverance is on the way.

What other ways do you know of to overcome fear?

Marked: An Excerpt

Happy Monday everyone! Here is an excerpt from my eBook released a couple of weeks ago. There is a link at the bottom if you would like to download the full version.

Blessings!

After everything I endured growing up, I had no idea that the first eight years of my marriage would be the hardest years of my life. We battled not only against my husband’s addiction to pornography, but against poverty, rejection, loss and depression. At times, I thought I would be crushed under the weight of daily life. We had a long, hard road ahead of us if we ever wanted to walk in true freedom.

When pornography invaded my marriage, I realized how much of a betrayal it is. Having a husband with this addiction is not just about what he is looking at. It is about being cheated on without the actual affair. It is about feeling inadequate every moment of every day. It is about believing that no matter how little you eat or how much you work out, you will never measure up to what he is looking at in secret.

Feelings of worthlessness were creeping in. I hated what I saw when I looked in the mirror. I wanted to be intimate with my husband but at the same time, I never wanted him to touch me again. I felt like a child being robbed of her innocence all over again. I began to question if I should have married him if this was what I had to look forward to for the rest of my life. On the outside, we were the perfect couple with the perfect marriage and the perfect ministry.

On the inside we were broken and ashamed.

For eight long years we fought this battle. I had seen deliverance so I believed it was there. In the midst of the anguish, God gave me an unfailing love for my husband and an ability to persevere in prayer long after I wanted to quit.

Yet even as I prayed, my self-worth was slowly being chipped away. I began to fantasize about being married to someone who would not put me through the pain of what I was dealing with. I could not be intimate with my husband without wondering who he was actually seeing or thinking about. I had never felt so ugly in my entire life. I wanted to leave but by this time we had three children and I could not imagine putting them through the pain of losing their father.

I turned to God and asked him to step in. I prayed that He would deliver my husband and we could move forward into the dreams we had. But He didn’t. I felt like God was turning a deaf ear to my cries. Little did I know that in the midst of my deepest pain, He was doing more than I could have imagined. I started to notice that when I would find evidence of pornography in the house, it would hurt less. Before long, my husband’s addiction lost the power to control me. God began to build me back up even as my husband continued to look elsewhere. He restored my worth and kept a guard around my heart. I was able to pray for my husband without feeling betrayed.

For another two years after God stepped in and placed a guard around my heart, my husband remained bound. I saw how desperately he wanted to be free and I realized how much it bothered him to know he was hurting me. He desired to be pure. He wanted a right relationship with God.

He was on his face crying out for healing and deliverance, and I was crying out with him. We were determined that our marriage would withstand the onslaught no matter how long it took.

Our freedom came through years of tears, prayer and struggle. Many times, we wanted to quit. Believing that we would one day be free often felt like an impossible task but the One who promised us freedom is faithful. When we were too weak to fight, He fought on our behalf. When we were ready to admit defeat, He stirred up that one last ounce of determination in our hearts. It was never easy, but it was worth it.

Eight years after the fight began, we emerged victorious. Our home is now completely free from addiction. Our marriage has been strengthened and renewed. We have a dream and a vision for our future. God is at the center of our family and we have a faith that cannot be shaken. God is our redeemer. We have seen deliverance and we will spend the rest of our lives sharing what He brought us through so that you will see it too.

Never give up until your struggle becomes your testimony.

To read my complete testimony, click here to download your FREE copy of Marked: the story of a desperate girl and the God who redeemed her.

Whose Fault is It?

What is your excuse for sin?

I know that when I choose to satisfy my flesh above choosing to walk in the power and promise of the Spirit to overcome evil, I always have a “reason”. Justification for what we have done seems to come so easily and is really nothing more than our way of convincing ourselves that our actions and choices are beyond our control, that we are being influenced by something greater than we are able to withstand. We make statements that not only contradict the Word, but also nullify the power of God to help us resist:

I really struggle with this issue.

I have an addiction.

I am not convicted about this, so it must be ok.

It is covered by grace.

I prayed about it and I believe God is saying I am permitted to do this.

It is not affecting anyone but me.

I have tried to be obedient, but it is just too hard.

What I am doing is not that bad.

I am in bondage; I can’t help it.

The list goes on and on. You probably have your own justifying statements for the wrong choices you make. I have said it before and I will say it again: sin is sin. You can reason it, justify it, defend it or try to hide it, but you can not deny it.

When Jesus spoke to the woman caught in adultery in John 8, He did not ask her why she sinned.

He did not dig into her past or her family history to determine if she could be excused from her sin because of outside factors. He did not ask her if she had a sexual addiction or a struggle with lust. He simply said “Neither do I condemn you. Now go and leave your life of sin”.

There is no condemnation for sin.

Forgiveness and freedom are available for us all. We need not live in guilt and shame, but we must choose to turn from sin to truly walk in freedom.

Jesus never said it would be easy to overcome your sin.

If you keep trying and failing, it does not make you a failure. If you are weak, you are human. If you struggle because you desire to sin, you are at war with your flesh. If you continue to fight by the power of the Holy Spirit, you will win. If you begin to believe you will never overcome, you will quit and sin will have power.

The greater power is in you.

Does it hurt to say no to sin? Yes. If you are dealing with recurring sin, bondage or addiction, it will really hurt. That does not mean you are exempt from taking steps. Take the first step to turn your back on sin and the power of God will meet you. When you do your part, His grace will enable you to go the distance.

We all sin. Don’t just accept it as part of your life.

Sinning and making it right is one thing. Accepting it as part of who you are is another. Never quit fighting sin and seeking more of the Holy Spirit. If you do not grow weary and give up, sin will lose it’s power and you will be free.

What excuses have you heard (or made) to justify sin?

From Bondage to Blessing

I have been criticized for my rigid stance on purity. When I wrote What’s so Magic About Mike? those who disagreed with my position believed that I was writing from a place of judgment and condemnation. The truth is, my desire to see the church living in purity has nothing to do with judging and everything to do with wanting to see freedom for the people of God. Still, many may wonder who I am to be challenging the church to such a standard.

I am the wife of a recovering pornography addict.

I am writing to the woman who feels ugly, rejected and worthless. The one who has come to hate what she sees when she looks in the mirror because she will never be able to measure up to the images in her husband’s mind.

To the young man or woman who is trapped by sexual addiction and feels powerless, ashamed and hopeless: I write for you.

I know the destructive power of sexual addiction. However, I also know that the power of my God far exceeds anything you are trapped by today. As someone who was once bound and is now free, please believe me when I say that if you do not give up the fight, you will emerge victorious.

I was a single mother at the age of eighteen.

Young woman who is contemplating abortion, I write for you. I know the fear in your heart but even in this, God has not forsaken you. If you seek Him, He will be found by you. Your life is not over. There is still hope and a future for you. It is not too late for you to become everything you were born to be and it starts with making the right choice now.

I struggled with issues of purity from the ages of seven to twenty-three.

At a very young age, my innocence was lost. I was never abused as a child, but I carried an overwhelming sense of worthlessness and impurity. Over time, it became so much a part of who I was that I could not break free.

To the one who has had your innocence stolen, I am writing for you. God can restore all things, even purity. In His eyes, you are not worthless or beyond redemption. If you will call on the name of Jesus, He will cover you with His purity and restore to you what has been lost.

I am now free from sexual sin, addiction and bondage.

Freedom did not come quickly or without cost, but today my husband and I are both walking in purity and wholeness.

To anyone who has quit believing that you will ever be able to overcome this struggle, I will always write for you. Freedom is a promise for the children of God and I will continue to write it, preach it and pray for it until I see it. Today, if you are trapped and struggling, please feel free to email me. I would love to pray for you.

To read my story of struggle and deliverance, visit the Free eBook page and click to download my full testimony Marked: the story of a desperate girl and the God who redeemed her.

Of No Reputation

Anytime you do something great for the Kingdom of God, you risk judgment, condemnation and rejection. In order to reach people where they are, it is often necessary to remember where you came from. Once you go there, you become vulnerable.

I came face-to-face with that reality yesterday when I released my testimony as an eBook. For the first time in my life, I spoke the whole truth about my life and what God has brought me through. I opened up about my childhood, my past and the struggles of my marriage. And I felt sick doing it.

I knew once those words were out there, they could not be taken back.

Not only was my life wide open to be judged and criticized by others, so was my husband’s. Writing that eBook, I faltered back and forth, asking myself if I should cut some of the content out to ensure that others were not offended and I was not completely exposed.

Then I thought about the teenager living with an alcoholic parent. I thought about the young woman who is pregnant, alone and ashamed. I considered the wife being robbed of her worth and dignity because of adultery or pornography. I pictured the young man trapped in the shame of private addiction. I felt the grief of loss and depression. My heart broke for every life shattered by lust, addiction or abuse with no glimmer of hope in sight.

The question then became not whether or not I should cut the content, but whether or not I was willing to be judged by many to help one. Was I prepared to face an onslaught of scrutiny and rejection if it meant that one person could come to believe that God had not left them and deliverance was on the way?

No question.

After what God has done for me, how could I possibly refuse to share it for His glory and the healing of those He loves? I took the leap and trusted God with the rest, knowing that He is my defender and the lifter of my head. I need not walk in shame or condemnation because He has set me free. I do not dwell on my time in Egypt because He has brought me to the Promised Land. I am free from the power of sin. And so are you.

If you know Him, He has already done a work in your life. He has brought freedom somewhere. He has healed you somehow. He has lifted you out of the pit and set your feet on a rock. He has redeemed you and given you a new life. Now someone, somewhere needs to hear what He has done for you so they can believe He will do the same for them.

Now, He asks “Will you sacrifice your reputation on the altar of  love and obedience to reach the lost, the hurting and the vulnerable”?

To receive your FREE copy of Marked: the story of a desperate girl and the God who redeemed her, please visit the Free eBook page and click the link to download.

Forgive, but Never Forget

What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. And if you allow it to, it will also make you wiser, kinder, and more powerful. Unfortunately, most of us keep the deepest parts of our journeys secret, never revealing our true selves and remaining paralyzed by fear of judgment.

If anyone ever had a reason to fear judgment, it was me. My parents divorced when I was in my teens. My dad was an alcoholic who died on the street in January of 2009. I lived a very promiscuous lifestyle and was pregnant at the age of 17. Until God got a hold of my life, drugs and alcohol were a constant part of my life.

I have been deeply hurt and have deeply hurt others. Shame and condemnation had an overwhelming grip on me for many years. All of the pain and regret of my past came with me into my marriage and an abundance of new issues presented themselves.

It was not until I began to bring who I truly was and everything I had lived through into the light that the power of darkness began to break. The more I became who I was, the more freedom I began to walk in. I began to realize that not one moment of my life needed to be wasted regretting what was already done. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, I could be transformed from the inside out and live the life I was destined to live.

Every Wednesday morning I teach a Bible study for the women at my church. Last week, the room was heavy as we were discussing how to be truly free to walk with Christ without the hindrances of habitual sin and bondage. The question was asked: how do we experience lasting freedom?

While we are still grappling with the answer to that question, one very poignant point was made. We are told to forgive and forget. When people hurt us, do not dwell on the pain. But what if remembering is the key to transformation?

Of course, we need to forgive if we want to live free. However, if we truly desire to become all we were meant to be, we need to remember.

Remember the time God gave you the strength to break the addiction. Remember how it felt to be judged so you will never want to be responsible for making someone else feel the same way. Remember where you came from so you don’t turn back. Remember.

One thing separates us from a world without Christ. One things gives us hope in the midst of hopelessness. One thing brings power to overcome: The presence and power of a God who redeems.

The world will never know His presence or power if we will not let them see what God has done for us. And the only way they will see what He has done, is if we reveal who we were and where we came from. Your testimony is the most powerful witness you possess.

What is stopping you from sharing it?